Manners-ism, How Etiquette may be the Next Avant-garde

Where have all the manners gone? Three things givefundamentalism, of current political, intellectual and
rise to my query. First, the failure of folks day bycultural debate. I'd like to think so, anyway. I'd like to
day to just say thank you for an act of kindness orthink that, just as Malcolm Gladwell's The Tipping
generosity. Second, as reported in the New YorkPoint ushered in an optimistic new way to think
Times recently, the dilapidated sportsmanship ofabout change, we are ready for a brand new
more than the usual handful of spoiled Olympicterritory where civility governs passion, where people
athletes who just can't grasp how they could lose orare free to think for themselves and where we
why bible-thick Omaha steaks aren't steaming awayactually listen to and consider alternative points of
on every streetcorner in Turin. For heroes like them.view. A non-left, non-right territory capable of fresh
And third, the rancorous mooing between herds thatideas. Less emphasis on being cool or on being
is the picture of current cultural discourse. Didrighteous, those identical twins, and more on being
someone say fair mindedness? What purple critterinteresting. See, good manners have a very
are you? A left-wing pundit (could just as well havepragmatic, even avant-garde potential. They open up
been a conservative one) recently extolled the virtuefresh space for new ideas, new ways of thinking.
of passion while defending an instance of clearlyThey usher in that most radical of subversives,
barbaric personal assault. We have a new it word, Ioptimism. If someone is polite to you, you listen.
suspect. Passion. A blanket exoneration of every kindListening in turn invigorates and reshapes your own
of stupid, well, mooing.thoughts. If someone is shouting at you, hey, you
Shake hands.shout back in the same cliches you alway use to
Back in ancient high school, that long ago, I threwshout back.
discus and shotput. Hated losing, loved to win. OfEtiquette classes for all of us.
course we want our team to be the best, but isn't itWhat a chimera, etiquette classes for young athletes.
also in our national interest to field a team ofHow about this, then. Etiquette classes for all of us.
competitors who are exemplary offspring of thatAnd every five years, a refresher course. Airline
responsible freedom we herald as mankind's highestpilots update their skills regularly. Rough weather,
ideal? Athletes as fair and generous in spirit as theyemergency situations, drastic loss of altitude are no
are ruthless in competition? I'd send every athleteless frequent in the skies of day-to-day life and
who wants to represent his or her country to aupdating the social skills to navigate through them
month of etiquette classes. This is how you shakessmoothly, graciously may not be such a bad idea.
hands. This is when you shake hands. OK, maybe notThank you.
the most dazzling form of athletic dexterity, butTwo words. One syllable each. We're not talking
essential nonetheless. Make the penalty for rottenelocutionary figure skating here. Simple, simple, simple.
behaviour severe.A handwritten note, into the envelope, on goes a
The Tipping Territory.stamp and you have sent a huge bouquet of goodwill
About passion, it's over, I think. At least as ainto the world. Better yet, forget the stamp and just
euphemism for the simplistic one-track thinking, ortuck it under your wife's coffee cup.